Thawing Out

So, as you may have noticed, I haven’t been around much. I usually take a few weeks off every year at the end of December, but this time, I had a sick wife. Since then, the new year has seemed like a real slog. Everywhere I look, there is chaos. The West Coast is on fire; the government is being stripped down from the inside out, families are torn apart, and people are losing their rights. It feels like we’re caught up in an inflection point of history, and not necessarily the good kind. I’m not going to pretend to know how all of this will play out, but I don’t think it’s a stretch to imagine that life as we know it will be quite different by the time it’s all said and done. If you feel like that’s unnerving, I’m with you. I know quite a few government employees, and they are all on pins and needles, wondering if they will still have a job even though they’ve done nothing wrong. It’s a lot of instability and chaos, for sure. My problem is that I’ve always been a very empathetic person. I care very much for the plight of my fellow man, and I’ve spent a lot of time trying to understand the struggles of others. That makes this time especially hard for me, as it rips my heart out to see so many people being hurt, especially when there is no need for it.

The question I’ve heard the most is, what can we do? What can any of us do? When the problem is so immense, what should we individuals do? I think the answer to that is to do what we can. What I mean is that none of us can change the entire thing, but we can do one small thing. We each have our own skills and talents, so do what you can. I’m creative, so naturally, I want to put my skills to work. But, for the last few weeks, I’ve been frozen, stunned by the enormity of it all. Since the November election, I’ve been in a creative rut. I haven’t written; I’ve barely blogged or posted. I’ve only worked on a secret project I will tell you about soon.

Other than that, I’ve felt hollow and tired. But slowly, like shoots poking out of the dirt in the Spring, I’ve felt my creativity slowly waking up. I’m surprised that all of this division and chaos is actually sparking a creative awakening in me. It goes beyond my everyday artistic endeavors, such as writing and creating websites. I’ve found myself wanting to paint, which is convenient since my wife bought me some brushes for Christmas and some ink. I’ve also found myself playing music again. It makes me feel good that my creativity is returning, almost like a reflex action to protect my psyche from the chaos that seems to surround us all.

So, hopefully, now that I’ve broken the ice and explained what is going on, I can move forward with my creativity and get back into the swing of things. As I’ve mentioned, I have a secret project that I’ve been working on that I can’t wait to share with you. In the meantime, I’ll close with a verse from the Canadian band Rush. It is a verse I return to often as it brings me a lot of comfort and explains my worldview.

“No, his mind is not for rent to any god or government.
Always hopeful yet discontent.
He knows changes aren’t permanent,
but change is!”

Take care, and stay creative!

– Ryan